Last Christmas seems so long ago, and this one has just flashed past too! My daughter and her boyfriend were here for a lightning visit, and for me this was a turning point. Usually, I break down in a whining heap after they leave, but this time not. I didn’t have the dread as we sat and drank a coffee at the airport. I was a little sad, but hugged them and got on with thinking about the Macdonalds on the way home.
The difference? She is now a partner, she is filled with her love for Paul, so in a sense I let my little girl go. I couldn’t even really have the conversation I wanted to with her about my health problem, that came out just in passing. She wasn’t interested.
I had to think back to my Mum and realised the hurt and pain she must have had when I went to Switzerland and later when I got married. I related the visit to how it was when Dave and I visited his parents all those years ago. I got some perspective. I have been longing to have a real conversation with my son as an adult, and last time he visited, there were at last hints he is growing. So there will soon be a time with Stef, maybe after marriage and babies when we will pull back together. And I can wait for this time, because I know at last it will come.